Thursday, October 18, 2012
It's hard to believe that it was only a year ago that Chris and I went on our cross country road trip.
Westward
From the air I trace my way back across the line we made--
the sharp cut through the geometries of spent corn and prairie
laced with twining arteries of muddy water--
that from up here glint like mercury.
All those broken, moldy, used up towns we passed
from here look neatly clumped and orderly.
I remember the cowboy cafe
smelling of stale cigarettes and mutton
and the four old ladies chatting over coffee
that looked like they smelled the same.
And the New Resurrection Chapel
set up in a rented storefront--
lines of plastic chairs and a music stand pulpit--
the hand-painted "Everybody Welcome" sign
in the cracked display window.
I remember all those garish rest stops brimming with fat travelers
loading up on Slim Jims and souvenirs.
But altitude tidies those things.
Way up here there are no details,
no glories, no disappointments,
only the path itself.
I fly with only a little bounce
over the tops of great electric downpours
like those we watched approach our windshield
in ominous walls.
Hard sheets of rain that focussed our huge anxieties
on the road ten feet ahead
instead of the time two weeks ahead
when I would leave you to your new life.
When I would leave you on the wrong coast--
the one your great great grandfathers
turned their sturdy backs on
at such cost.
They fled the bounties of the east
its rolling, woody greens,
its broadening and burdening civilities
its thick wet air.
They walked our same path in reverse.
They carved the road we took.
Their every ford of our scenic Sweetwater was heroic.
They stumbled through our interesting badlands
goading thirsty animals, greasing axels,
patching boots.
They sang by day and kept a careful eye on the horizon.
They sang by night in tight circles and slept with their rifles.
They watched the great mountains slowly rise up before them
and felt the air get thin and dry and cool.
They buried their children along our road.
On that windy Wyoming plain
when we found the rock where they'd carved their names,
I wondered if their ghosts watched dismayed--
I wondered if they felt betrayed
as you moved east.
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This is gorgeous, Jana - I copied and sent it to my sister-in-law and niece who are heading across the country to enroll my niece in s residential treatment program in Boston for borderline personality disorder. A scary time but the road trip will be an unforgettable prelude to what we hope will turn things around for her. Her Mom will be taking that same plane trip back across the country after leaving her daughter at the hospital, so the poem will really resonate...
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